dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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