He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
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