i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Randomize
