Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
Im part way to drunk.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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