I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
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