oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
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