I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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