We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Randomize
