I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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