i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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