Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize