i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
home. puking in laundry basket.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
Randomize
