If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
