Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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