PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
Randomize
