Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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