dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
