There is no way he is gay with that hair.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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