so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
