if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize