dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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