if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
At least life still wants to fuck me.
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