no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Randomize
