i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
