Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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