So drunk its hurt
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Randomize