I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
