In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
