ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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