Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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