We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize
