Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
