I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
