OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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