Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I'm sobbing to NWA
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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