So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
My ass is underappreciated
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
