I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Randomize
