I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
