Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
