Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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