We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize