ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
