If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
