is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Randomize
