whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
