I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
