I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
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