butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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