So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
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