just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
