I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
she went home with me because she said i reminded her of paul rudd. remind me to thank him for his awkwardness
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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